Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
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