I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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