i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
