Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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