Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Randomize