The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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