I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
