I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
