i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
MIDGETS
????
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Randomize
