I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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