I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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