It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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