so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
