...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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