My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
