My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
