wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
