Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize