Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
