the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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