Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
