plz talk dirty to me
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
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I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
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