she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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