fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
