I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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