i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
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