do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
