Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
