..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Randomize
