she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
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