Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
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