We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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