Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
