So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
