farters have to be the big spoon...
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Randomize
