you win again, gameday.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize