How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
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