So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
