garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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