Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
