Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
