Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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