You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
