and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
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