I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
We're like a lot better than the average bears
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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