Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
