Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
