It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
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