I wannas sexs uuuuu
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize