My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
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