She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
