I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
