after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
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