chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize