Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Randomize
